HOW DO YOU KEEP A HOUSE CLEAN?

This topic was suggested (inadvertently) by my oldest son the other day. It was the question he asked before he went back home. I've thought about it a lot since Monday when I saw him last.


There have been two times in my life when I've been able to keep a clean and organized house. Both times it took a lot of effort on my part and once, I realize now, was because I was living by myself.


I've always admired people who live in clean and organized (as in decluttered) homes. And I want to slap them when I come into their place and they say, "please excuse the mess" when, looking around, I'd give my eye teeth to have the kind of "mess" they're talking about! What mess, I think? I wish I had this kind of mess at my house!


I've yet to fully understand how other people do it--keep their houses like the ones you see in Better Homes and Gardens. I have done it in the past but the circumstances, I've found, have to be just right.


The first time I was able to keep a tidy home I had one young child and was a stay-at-home Mom.  I decided to set up a rigid schedule. Although I can't remember exactly what that schedule was (after all it was 40 yrs. ago!) I think it went something like: Mondays--overall clean-up from the week end; Tuesday concentrate on dusting; Wednesday-light housekeeping, putting things away; Thursday - clean the bathrooms --we had 1-1/2; Friday - mop the floors and vacuum again in preparation for the week end. At the time, we had a roughly 1100 sq. ft. house.


I adhered to that schedule so rigidly that if a friend wanted to do something--go for a walk or out shopping during any one of those times I was supposed to be cleaning I'd turn her down because I knew if I deviated from that schedule even just slightly I might never go back to it. Like an addict desperately trying to stay clean, I knew the state of the house depended on my adhering strictly to that schedule.


Even after our second son was born and we moved into a much larger (as in twice as large) house, I was pretty much able to maintain that schedule. After all, I reasoned, my husband worked to support us every day and keeping the house in order was my job.


Then I went back to work and I tried to turn into "superMom"! I went back to work not because we needed the money to pay the bills but because I wanted to.  This was my choice; my luxury; my freedom from the mundane. The responsibilities to the house and my family never changed. I just had to squeeze in all my household duties into smaller time slots to allow for the hours I got to work outside the home. Working outside the home was a privilege I was allowed and could only be done if my household duties were not effected by it.


I remember getting up even earlier in the morning to bake fresh cookies for everyone's lunches and still get everyone and myself off to work in time! It was a frenetic pace but I was able to maintain it for quite some time partially because I was working as a temp and would have extra days off between assignments.


It never occurred to me to ask for much help. I just had two jobs now instead of one--both of them "part-time" jobs. And my two sons and husband fully accepted this as their due. It never occurred to my husband to offer to help. Dinner was still ready for him when he came home. Breakfast was served and lunches made before he left. His laundry automatically appeared clean and folded in his dresser drawers and hung up in his closet.  His part was to go to work and produce a paycheck, keep the lawn mowed (or snow cleared although I helped with that as well), and be the general handyman around the house. Things stayed like that for a number of years.


And then came the day when I was tired and feeling overwhelmed and things began to slide. Even as the boys got older, little was said about their responsibilities in maintaining a clean and presentable house. It was always my job--after all, I was the Mom. Even when my job became full time and I literally put more time into working outside the home than my husband did (he was a teacher), the responsibilities were rarely shared.


More on this tomorrow--or the next time I contribute! My chickens need feeding and I need to get on with the rest of my day!


Peace and Love,


Carol