Dennis and Millie have discovered Dad's garage and have been working on it for the last few days! Poor Dad is a bit anxious but we've done our best to assure him it will be easier for him in the long run. There are actually paths to walk through it now!
Dennis righted the greenhouse we thought a lost cause! And it withstood yesterday's high winds so guess it's up for good now! The back of the house is almost together now now--finally after two yrs.! Dennis saved us some money by helping Dad with this too.
I am beginning to see that this place is more than Dad can handle. I don't know exactly what the problem is==physical or psychological--but it is something I need to be alert to. For me, this is the most wonderful place! I love every bit of it! But Dad seems tired all the time and unwilling to do all that is necessary to keep the place up at least not without assistance.
Part of it I think is because we made the unfair assumption that Jeff and Jenn would be able and willing to help us--I knew it would be too much for us alone. And although I think they are willing they simply are not able to help at this time in their busy lives. If Jeff's bank had not been sold, I think he would have been in more of a position but that was not meant to be.
I do think though that if I can't find a way for Dad to pick up the pace, we may have to seriously consider giving it up for something easier to handle. When I see Millie's Mom so faded away in the wheelchair, locked away in a nearly useless body, I wonder how far away Dad is from that.
Depressing thoughts but ones I need to think about. He's passed all his mental and physical tests so I wonder how much is mental. Discouraging but facts I must face.
Anyway, Millie and Dennis have decided there isn't a tool Dad doesn't have so he should be set in that dept.!
Gotta run! Maybe more tomorrow!
Love,
Carol
Saved by the Grace of God
1 year ago
1 comment:
Mom, Sounds like Dennis and Millie’s visit is being highly productive.
I don’t know what to tell you about Dad. It is my nature to say that yes, there is too much. But there has to be an understanding there that this may not be a bad thing, it is just that things like the green house may not get done. Things are perfectly as they are. Someone once told me that I had to learn to shorten my reach. It took me a long time to figure out why that would be useful. I look at all of the clutter in my house that is collateral from all the little things that come up in life and I see clearly that desiring less can be beneficial. The time could be coming soon where you should begin to do a little more than clean up, but go deeper. I think you are already preparing for that.
As far as trying to diagnose the problem, my guess would be a combination of physical and psychological. Requiring the will to do the mundane may be one of the few things that separates us from wild animals. The human body is a pretty complicated machine, doctors only practice medicine and don’t know all there is to know about it and Psychology is still in the dark ages. If he is not suffering then I think it is ok, unless it is making you suffer, but then you have to ask yourself who’s problem that really is.
Take the “depressing” out of your thoughts and take heart in the fact that you can appreciate the moments that you are here for. Life is shorter than a flash of lightning. Persevere brightly!
Love you
Jordan
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